Fvck Feminism

Lemme tell you about the reasons I simply cannot be bothered with feminists.

1. If society is a Venn diagram, you can drop in two circles, one for socially acceptable activism, another for popularity activism and a third for savior type activism. Feminists seem about to balance 2 at a time, but don't meet in the middle, leaving an area I will call maverick activism, which is frowned upon because it offends too many people. (This can also be applied to black ass activism). In these sections, you can find the sub sections of the placard holding activists, the highly educated activists who write and present, the mature activists who act for the greater cause, the green activists who want to fix everything and bring everyone together and the desk activists who can drop you link on top of link supporting why there is a need for activism. In that grey area of maverick activism, you find the ones who start the battle cry, refuse to support oppressive businesses regardless of who might suffer, who get into politicians faces and piss off EVERYBODY by slamming doors on people who still want to hold polite rebellions, in case you wanted to be certain, I'm in there. Booty popping, jaw dropping, pugnacious and present. 

And suspiciously cute with it...

2. They don't realistically understand why feminism today, is not going to work with the principles of yesterday. In other words equality has been achieved. We hold the right to vote. We can wear pants. We get paid based on our capability, experience and skillset, hurrah. We still ain't shit to society (men and women, and those in-between). They don't understand that some women WANT to be housewives, dependent on their husbands, comfortable to sacrifice the "privilege of working to support themselves", but that still does not mean they're to be overlooked and forsaken. Feminism does not realistically address the fact that everyone has the right to choose where they want to be, sure some feminists claim that's why they're feminists but their echo chambers would show different.

3. White feminism is not inclusive of the needs of black women. No no, don't start telling me oh but it's universal, white feminists want the same thing. By their privilege ALONE they definitely can't be wanting nothing for me, but to move out my fucking way, and lemme get some of the rights they've skated on for decades.

4. Intersectionalism heroics is a thing. The privileged middle class feminist using the keywords "oppressed urban women" as her go to conversation for why she's a feminist, is pandering. She has realized if she comes forward to be the savior, chances are people will remember her name if not her contributions, which really aren't ever that poignant, but hey she uses her voice selflessly for the more oppressed, right? Wrong.

5. Oppression Olympics within intersectional feminism is significantly MORE annoying that playing pin the offense on the wypipo. We're all women, but, you're really going to tell me that you as a working class woman, educated and wise, cannot understand the full reasons why you can't speak for upper class housewives, or lower class sex workers? Yet you want to use the moment these extremely marginalized groups finally do come forward to finally give voices to their struggles to show YOUR own oppression? Cute.

6. Feminism still hasn't evolved to recognize that men don't need feminism. We're claiming that men oppress us, right? We don't need to explain certain things to them, right? Problem is, feminists are woefully idealistic about how men will react to women passively sneaking "power" away from them. I'm going to be honest, working with feminists helped me to realize why certain freedom fighting slaves were okay shooting the slaves who were afraid of absolute freedom.

7. They tone police the ever living fuck outta everybody who doesn't speak their individual bullshit diatribe. This isn't exclusive to feminists, I've seen wypipo do it, where they're all for George Lopez, but Dave Chappelle is too crass. Feminists like to throw around words like "problematic" and "divisive" to describe ANYONE who uses common methods, and vernacular while debating against their bullshit. Comically, they'd then turn around and attempt to convince the very people they have told to shut up, that they're supporting them. I mean, STFU, but I'm here for you.

8. Too much time spent arguing with idiots, not enough time spent educating themselves to recognize an idiot, and simply shut it down. Say what you have to say in the simplest ways instead of trying to sound like a fucking philosophy major, when your major is "Juno". Recognize that you don't need to address EVERY. SINGLE. INSTANCE where a man repeats the same damn commentary you KNOW you've argued against for years.

9. They can never smell their own bullshit. In my own experience, for years, feminists will sit down and argue the most counterproductive shit, going on and on convincing themselves that they're winning arguments. When all they're doing, is screaming look at me, I'm a woman, therefore I'm worthy. If you have to announce your worth, in a circle that cannot see your worth, you're kinda not really capitalizing on your worth, you're wasting it. You're bullshitting for the audience. Why are you so entitled that you must advertise not your awareness, but your worth?

10. I'm way too aggressive for feminists. I will call you on your shit, at dawn, at dusk, while riding your dick, getting my hair braided, delivering your baby, ordering soup or picking up the children from school, whenever. I will not accept platitudes of dismissal, masquerading as pretentious moments of acknowledgement. Fuck all that. You doing shit, being passively divisive and I'm going to tell you. Then I'll move back to my chill setting and carry on. I don't have time to dwell on every moment that someone feels I'm so angry with them that I must stay in that moment reliving an unnecessary loop of anger until they feel satisfied that I am aware my anger worried them. I got angry, I said my piece, I moved on. I did what I needed to do to make peace in my own head. Fuck off now. We supposed to have work to do.

This is the beginning of it, I have huge issues with feminism, or even being identified by that title. Trust issues, experience issues, lots of collective bullshit that has seen me lose my shit, to the point that I began to question if I gave a fuck about women's issues or not.

To me it's like, if Feminism is the answer, who the fuck is asking that question?

Cuz I'll be real, I certainly cannot see any place for me, in a feminist world.

This One is For The Rough And Tough Women

It's at this moment, Miley KNEW, she fucked up.

Everybody loves to come for us loud mouth aggressive girls, for example, Rihanna once mic punched a dude in the head because he didn't understand not to touch her, and later in life, she was recorded in the incident when she snarled "Move" at another guy who didn't want to understand she wasn't going to have her path blocked by him. Of course there's Nicki Minaj's "Miley, What's good?" outburst at the 2015 VMAs, the COUNTLESS times Mo'Nique has been called an "Angry Black Woman", and the mother of all us ruthlessly, unapologetic un-ladies, Grace Jones.

People stay reviling these women and their ability to take no shit and react, writing them off as loose cannons only dependable for the stereotypical, predictable eruptions of wrath. "Nothing but drama, ugh, didn't have to act like that" is the sentiment they usually echo when describing our flare-ups. 

As one of these women, I realized young, we constantly find ourselves shut out of social circles, professional circles and familial circles, because someone pushed us too far, and we react. 

We're never given a chance because we "live for drama", which isn't the case, many of us do not in fact, enjoy drama or being messy, which is why we react so explosively when faced with situations that could have been avoided if persons had respected our boundaries, opinions, space, time or any other triggers that we are usually transparent in regards to how easily disregarding such things set us off.

People don't like us because we start with being loud and leave no room for them to attempt their bananagans resulting in a buncha unnecessary shit, that we really didn't want to accommodate in the first place. We clip it quickly, loudly, aggressively.

Apparently that makes us problematic. Apparently that means we can not be the voice for certain causes, as we don't represent "the ladies", ours is not the voice that the decent, middle class, decent ones ever want.

They will envy our skill at keeping the crowds attention, they will charge us with starting the fight, because we the aggressive girls, we never back down, we stand our ground and we will drag everybody to good reasoning, whether they want it or not.

We cast aside our own fears, and let our loudest voices speak, for everyone who doesn't have a voice, knowing that it is us, who will be blamed the INSTANT something goes wrong, knowing it is us who everyone considers the drama queens and way too extra messy chicks.

That's fine.

so yall gonna let these heauxs off cuz they speak
softly? 

What about those passive aggressive, pretentious women, who manipulate situations, use and abuse the same aggressive women, then use the fact that the aggressive women are known for their incredibly short fuses to isolate them wrongfully, using a gossamer of convenient truths, to support the view that the loud, aggressive women, are so problematic that no one can engage them without it falling to pieces?

What about those women who hide their unscrupulous, self serving purposes, behind the pretense of being well intended, well behaved, and adjusted women?

Aggressive women get a bad rap, we stand judged based on other people's discomfort in dealing with confrontation, and it is used against us, by people who KNOW confrontation would reveal that there is justification for our aggression. Yet we are the ones who people approach with distrust and anxiety, because we get painted as the ones who have questionable motives, and that's why we blow up.

  

All the while letting the manipulative lil bitches, (who know to prey on the fear of confrontation by the meek and quiet) get away with destroying the image of anyone not forthcoming to being used as their patsies. 

Cute as a button, but pugnacious as a motherfucker

As a loud and aggressive woman, I like to look around me ever so often, and take stock of the people who have remained in my life, not DESPITE of my aggression, but, because of it.

My best friends have been in my life, one since we were 5, another since we were 14, and the final ones came in my adult life. Only one of them has an equally explosive temper matching mine, and he too, learned over the years to temper himself, after being blamed for being the one who always blows up, but, he is a man, the concerns about his temper comes with the presumption that as a man he is SUPPOSED to be aggressive, he is SUPPOSED to be confrontational, that is the way of the alpha male. 

He has stood by me through some flat out bullshit from people, and watched me defy socialization and instead of hiding, I chose to blow up, I chose to let it all out. 

That's what makes me wonder, is it that people see aggressive women as problematic, or is it that society is full of shit, and our tendency to violently reject manipulation, abuse and oppression worries society, first because society likes being manipulated, and manipulating the oppressed, and secondly, because it is known that we are the ones who are the front line in the wars? 

Sure the diplomats talk and dance, looking pretty in the limelight, but it is us, the warriors who put ourselves on the line, beating our chests in defiance, and roaring in the face of anyone who stands between us, and our goals, we carry the weight of being the ones who refuse to be bullied into a corner, yet, we are called bullies, because we discard any pretense of urbanity, and simply let them have "it", as offenders should, in necessary circumstances.